31 December, 2008

"Cold Red Wine is a Crime" or The Barefoot Baklesa's 2008 Year in Review

This being The Barefoot Baklesa's 2008 Year in Review or "Cold Red Wine is a Crime" [due to a cold glass of red wine in my hand now...]

Before I begin, allow me to invoke the divinities of the Theater.

Dionysus, ancient greek god of the theatre, wine, and revelry...
Saints Genesius and Vitus, roman catholic martyrs and patron saints of the theater...
Idianale, ancient filipino goddess arts, crafts, love, and good deeds...
As we look back at the year that has been, bless the year that is to be.
Set ablaze the spark of inspiration,
Fuel the creativity and passion of your artists that we may look forward to another year on the boards.
We carry with us this Hope, so be it.

What a year this has been...
In that expanse, For the most part, I have experienced the fulfillment one's soul receives in living the dream. But on the other hand, it was not without those moments that need much to be desired.

In one year [counting the good and the bad], I have survived opening two children's musicals on the same weekend with some unwanted consequences, I have made more trips to Divisoria than ever, I associated myself -with much regret- with some artists of questionable talent [if you could call it that], I survived performing a Shakespeare show with the worst fever and cough combined, I have taken more crap than I should from some vampires, I have met some fierce and true friends, I have been chastised for attempting to do my job well one time,I have survived the "niki de los reyes-torres carroza challenge", I have seen some people's true colors, I have been called one of the worst designers at some diss-list, I was offered the opportunity of a lifetime and I turned it down because I felt I had to stay, I have been the subject of internet slander and character assassination, I have rediscovered Love in a movie, and I have begun writing scripts again... Amidst all of this, it seems strange that I still said, "Life couldn't get any better" in one of my other social networking sites.

However, some things that have transpired, been said, and done have already left their mark. And truth be told, I am spent... And for that, I have considered to put my theater career [ whatever is left of that dead horse ] on hold indefinitely, after I fulfill certain obligations I have already signed for this 2009. It's not as if that's a big loss the way I am at present, right? For no one is indispensable in this industry, they say. Someone else, in a minute, can take anyone's place and can do better. So the quest now, is to be able to develop skills to do better.

For next year, I want to rediscover those things that I have put aside for some time now, I want to get treatment for the few things the skin doctors still have to figure out, I want to do something that actually makes a difference in more people's lives, and I want to be found...

"It's New Year's Eve,
And hopes are high.
Dance one year in,
Kiss one goodbye.
Another chance,
Another start,
So many dreams to tease the heart...
We don't need a crowded ballroom,
Everything we want is here.
If you're with me,
Next year will be,
The perfect year."
~Sunset Bouleveard

26 December, 2008

The Barefoot Baklesa's Top 10 Christmas Memories

Here we go... A day after the 25th, decompressing from the rush... I've drafted this a while ago but never got to posting it.

10. The C.O.D. Animated Christmas Displays
~ Back when I was a child, my mother would always take me to the Cubao shopping district in Quezon City where the
C.O.D. department store was. During the Holidays, the department store would create these animated Christmas themed displays [something like that "it's a small world" ride at disney] that had its own take on the Christmas Story. They would often portray Filipino Christmas traditions like the misa de gallo, children caroling door to door, the making ang lighting of parols -and all of these would somehow happen at the same time or coincide with the Christmas Story to which Christ's Nativity is the finale. I remember being in awe of these crude robotics as a child. In the late 90s, C.O.D. put up its last display; the store it seemed had seen better times. I'm glad the mall at Greenhills purchased the old displays and re-fitted them just recently for another generation of kids to enjoy.

9. The Scent of Ham
~In the days leading towards Christmas, my mother would purchase these hams from Excellente, a ham specialty shop near Quiapo Church in Manila. She would have entire ham legs shipped to Antique and i remember the smell of it. Passing by Excellente recently, i tried to see if I could get acquainted with that old scent, but the crowds of people for the holiday rush deemed it futile.

8. The Parols on display at Central Market
~I haven't been there in years, but when I first went there, I was no more than seven or eight years old. In the dry goods section of the market, which was adjacent to the street, the sellers would hang rows of parols -in all sizes, shapes, and colours- by the hundreds. [ Parol: adapted from the Tagalog word 'parola' which means lighthouse. a Parol is a star-shaped lantern, either 5 or 8 pointed, used as decoration for the christmas season in the philippines. The Parol is said to symbolize the star that led the magi to the newborn messiah. ]

7. The Ayala Avenue Christmas Displays
~ I don't know if it's just me, but don't you guys feel like the Ayala Avenue christmas decorations look so depressing? Those 'kugels' mounted on the light posts look awful...Who uses bronze slash brown with that blue? What happened to the days when Ayala Avenue used to be the grandest and brightest lit this time of year? The displays at bangkok and tokyo could run circles around this one. Oh well...

6. Roast Chicken and Rosemary Leaves
~ There's something to be said about the memory associated with the smells of food. Aside from the usual jamon, quezo de bola, and bibingka [rice cakes], the rosemary roasted chicken that we cook religiously on noche buena [except for that one year we had a pig's head...] is one of the familiar smells I would always expect at our kitchen on christmas eve.

5. The Many Trips to Divisoria
~ You haven't experienced Christmas in the Philippines until you have gone to shop at divisoria towards the Christmas rush. It's just insane... talk about the wave of people, the pushing, the noise... It's often beyond description.

4. He-Man and the Masters of the Universe
~ I spent a fair amount of my childhood playing with He-Man action figures. Back then, one action figure from the standard series would cost 49.99 pesos while a new release would be no more than a hundred pesos. There was a particular christmas when my mom got me four action figures:
Man-At-Arms, Mosquitor, that one with the elephant's head that squirts water, and another one of those villains i can't recall. I think I pretty much admitted to my age with this memory.

3. Nativity Sets at C.O.D.
~ I began collecting nativity sets since i was a kid...I even made some from clay.Whatever happened to the really good nativity sets where there was more than one shepherd and not limited to seven pieces? C.O.D had the best collection of nativity sets. They used to display like 20 of them in one table averaging 16 characters a set in their many sizes. That's when my penchant for nativity sets began, i think. I have 28 of them at present.

2. The Lights at Ateneo Bel Field
~ At Christmas time, they would light up the old acacia trees that surround Bel Field with these tivoli lights wired as drop lights on the tree branches. One year, they put up blue and white parols with the tivoli lights, and I would look forward to coming out of the Rizal Study Foyer after one of our Tanghalang Ateneo shows or Xavier Hall and seeing this enchanting sight. I would spend some time just admiring it or walking under the lights just before I get home. And when there was a meteor shower, they encouraged everyone to watch it at Bel Field...people brought their guitars, sang, smoked, ate, hung-out, told stories...Oh, that was some christmas memory.

1. Mount Carmel Church in New Manila
~ When I was about six or seven years old, we used to live near the area of Mount Carmel Church, thus I grew up listening to these English Priests with their pristine accents every sunday. I remember coming out of the Christmas Morning mass, while holding on to my mother's hand as we were walking across the courtyard, a boy approached us and he was begging for some money. As a kid, my mother would place a twenty peso bill in my left pocket, and a white handkerchief and a rosary on my right every time we went to mass. And that particular Christmas, instead of a twenty, i had a couple of crisp five peso bills in my pocket, and we were walking quite a few steps with that boy in front of us -palms out- and i never knew what came over me but i suddenly took out the folds of five peso bills and gave it all to him. Later, when we got home, my mother told me that every Christmas, the Christ Child would always come and visit as a beggar child. Fast forward to the 25th of december 2006, we had this party for some kids around our neighborhood. I had 47 ticket stubs for the 47 kids we invited. But I packed 48 goodie bags instead, just to be safe. After the snacks and games, i had them fall in line to take a goodie bag and pick a raffle number to coincide with the prizes. And then a cute but rather untidy child shows up at the line, he didn't have a stub, but i did have the 48th goodie bag and he was able to take home a prize as well. And when it was all over, my mother asked me if i remember seeing that child come in or out of the gate. I had no idea... and then i remembered that boy at mount carmel church once again. So, if you do encounter such a child, it wouldn't hurt to be a little charitable.

That's pretty much it. Tis the 2nd day of Christmas...no true love sending anything yet. Hahahaha!

20 December, 2008

On My Father's Death [two hours before his funeral]

Last Thursday, my father, Raymundo Dayrit Torres, was found dead due to massive heart failure in his sleep.

For the longest time, people have been asking me where my father is or why he isn't really featured in this show where I play me. And for the longest time, I have been telling people that he is already dead. I have been quoted saying, "Well, officially, he's dead." or "Kung ako nga, pinabayaan kong namatay si Ray nang di ko kinakausap."

It's quite complicated to expound on really...

Not long ago, i blogged about it in one of those pass-it-on blogs [that require you to be honest], that I have told people that he has been dead although he was still alive [and even then, it was already in the past tense -as if anticipating it eitherway]. I think it started after the first time he had a stroke... And, as much as I love Ñora Pina, his mother [my paternal grandmother], let me just say that whatever affinity I had towards the other Torreses have long since disintegrated the day I told them that the only way I could forgive them is that if they go down on their knees and ask for it... And even if they did that, it would still require some thought.

I'm writing about this to finally put that part of my life behind me. For one, I haven't spoken with Ray at all since the death of Don Isidro [his father] in 1997; and now that he's passed on, I think I have prepared myself for this moment by having convinced myself that he has been dead for the longest time. Some way for one to ask the universe for something, huh?

In all fairness to him, I'd rather that he did not suffer any further in this life. I'm not that heartless after all, or at least I try to convince myself...

In a few hours, he'll be six feet under... And i keep on hearing that quote that says "Life gives us many opportunities to start over" but I don't think Ray made any effort at all to start over. Paolo once told me, that if you fall down at 7 then get up at 8 [wisdom from someone younger than me...hahaha! ]. You see, in my late teen years, all I saw was this brilliant man who refused to get up at level 8 and just gave up. I won't be that...


So Ray, wherever you are now, I hope you're happy... Don't worry about me, i have endured thus far. I do ask you to forgive me for not trying though, I think I get that from you.

16 December, 2008

Dingdong Dantes: 3rd Sexiest Man?





I used to go to school with this guy, not so long ago... If you've studied at that jesuit university along katipunan, you know how that sea of blue and white treat actors who take the teeny-bopper and the local primetime tv route. Antoinette Taus once walked those hallowed halls with people going, "Gosh, how baduy..." amongst other things. And I've heard about the urban legends of Kris Aquino using the back stairs of Gonzaga and Berchmans to be fetched by her car to avoid the "tantiyawan" that some blue eagles are capable of. Now, back to Dingdong, I just don't find him as sexy as the others do. When he started posing in his undies, I wasn't sure what to make of it. I know that he has a great body, but there are guys I would rather much prefer clothed... That's me being such a prude...

So, now that he's the 3rd Sexiest Man according to E! Television, what does that mean, really?

I'm a bit sleepy, i had better get some rest..i'm driftin in and out of consciousnes...